the young and the restless

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Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a mental health condition in which a person has long-term patterns of unstable or turbulent emotions. These inner experiences often result in impulsive actions and chaotic relationships with other people.


Persons with BPD are often uncertain about their identity. As a result, their interests and values can change rapidly. They also tend to view things in terms of extremes, such as either all good or all bad. Their views of other people can change quickly. A person who is looked up to one day may be looked down on the next day. These suddenly shifting feelings often lead to intense and unstable relationships.

Other symptoms of BPD include:

Intense fear of being abandoned

Cannot tolerate being alone

Frequent feelings of emptiness and boredom

Frequent displays of inappropriate anger

Impulsiveness, such as with substance abuse or sexual relationships

Repeated crises and acts of self-injury, such as wrist cutting or overdosing

Narcissistic personality disorder is a condition in which people have an excessive sense of self-importance, an extreme preoccupation with themselves, and lack of empathy for others.


A person with narcissistic personality disorder may:

React to criticism with rage, shame, or humiliation

Take advantage of other people to achieve his or her own goals

Have excessive feelings of self-importance

Exaggerate achievements and talents

Be preoccupied with fantasies of success, power, beauty, intelligence, or ideal love

Have unreasonable expectations of favorable treatment

Need constant attention and admiration

Disregard the feelings of others, and have little ability to feel empathy

Have obsessive self-interest

Pursue mainly selfish goals

as i continue to work with others who are addressing addiction and/or seeking recovery, a very simple yet profound realization has come into view. those who are new to recovery often have not had the time nor the inclination to experience nor even consider what calm, peace, and serenity are. most of the time those attributes may not even be remotely in view. what seems more likely to the beginning of recovery is a tendency to lean towards chaos and drama for a feeling of comfort. since their lives and their brains have probably been steeped in crazy for a period of time, that is where they tend to take encounters,  because that is what is most familiar.

interestingly, it becomes necessary to allow people the space to have their own discovery process around this, without strong redirection and hopefully without doing do much damage as they strive to rule planet chaos. this is ideally what i like to do. but man- it is not always how the story plays. often, for me, my patience gets tried or my own history at the theatre of the absurd goes into revival and i seem to intervene.

i cannot know just how this small reveal will shift my days, nor can i know if that shift will have an impact on those i encounter. i do believe that a new level of empathy has been ushered in. i know that the soap opera of new recovery will be seen in a new light- hd if you will. stay tuned.

Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.

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